Our Scripture reading today is Romans 12:19, "Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord."
 
If we would be willing to humble ourselves then it would much easier to not seek avenging or revenge.  We are all guilty sinners deserving of the wrath of God.  What did my sins do to the Lord Jesus?  What did your sins do to the Lord Jesus?  Turn your eyes to the cross and it should cause you to let something go towards a family member or friend that you are holding onto.  If there is something that needs to be judged, God will definitely look after it in just the right way.